Cauliflowers Through the Catflap

and Other Tales From a Solitary Lockdown

“I see this as an important book… one high-risk, single woman’s view on how she, personally, coped with an unprecedented situation and who is not afraid to bare all… literally!! The fact that it also looks at the situation from political and other angles is integral to the overall read…”

This is the story of a solitary Lockdown… a story of bloody-minded self-preservation replete with moments of anxiety, resignation and sadness but also with joy, hilarity and above all dogged determination. Cassandra – sixty-five years old, single and somewhat immobile – struggles with myriad new challenges as she watches herself – and the world – change from within her self-imposed fortress.

In November 2019, she had a terrifying nightmare which warned of something very bad emerging from China. In early January 2020, she had a subsequent and similarly disturbing dream in which she found herself in an empty and deserted Italian castle, furnished solely with a single ventilator tent.

Forewarned by these dreams she threw herself into a frenzy of logistical planning, laboriously turning her spare bedroom into a store cupboard stuffed with many (rigorously disinfected) boxes of sensible, nutritious, long-life and probably disgusting dehydrated foods – ready for whatever The Fates had in store.

On the 3rd March 2020, notwithstanding the dithering of the UK government, Cassandra unequivocally shut herself away, refusing to open the door to anyone and using a newly acquired pink megaphone with which to communicate, through the closed window.

Have a listen to an excerpt, read by Cassandra:

“Her joy of life and all its idiosyncrasies married with her love of language will take you on ride which alerts you to the sense of the ridiculous as she sees it”

Sir Gonzos’ review at Slap Magazine (supporting Local Artists & Performers) on Cauliflowers Through the Catflap.

SLAP MAGAZINE